“…cusp and midnight, the year’s threshold and unlocking, where the past lets go of and becomes the future; the place of caught breath.”

The day represents a pause in the cycle of nature, a time to reflect. How many of us will feel that cosmic change in radiant energy around and in us when the sun appears to stop its movement north? Or have we lost that connection between our soul and nature?

The ancients saw this physical event and changed it into an experience with meaning. Cultures have for thousands of years heeded this day’s significance. 

Backward-looking and Forward-looking

In contemporary history, June 21 was declared a Day of Reflection in 2007 for the people of Northern Ireland, the Republic of Ireland, and Great Britain. As it’s a backward-looking and forward-looking day, they pause to remember the violence that tore its nation apart—the looking back—and also the looking forward to a peaceful new society, asking how and what they can do to rebuild and restore this new society. Inclusivity and sensitivity underpin the day’s honoring. It’s a neutral space, as the day’s significance is related to a naturally occurring event, and nature makes no division between races, creeds, or political viewpoints. 

Cultivate an Hourglass Meditation

Based on one’s spiritual proclivities, many meditations for the Summer Solstice can be found on the web. I prefer focusing on change and light, two primary elements of this day, using the hourglass as a visual soul-crafting symbol. This meditation can be done in five minutes or thirty or more, and brings you into contact with your body’s wisdom—our bodies know things and send us messages, such as where stress makes its home in us. And it’s okay to keep paper and pencil handy to jot down any significant insights, but then move gently back into your breath. Make sure to relegate your ego to the back seat—now’s not the time for it to take control. 

• Begin by moving into a comfortable position, whether that be sitting, walking, or lying down. 
• Take a couple of deep breaths, inhaling and exhaling slowly. 
• Picture the large, upper rim of the hourglass, bringing in your current experiences—such as what your body feels: the air on your skin, how your body feels on whatever surface it is touching. 
• Move into your body with your breath, to where you feel these physical sensations. 
• Feel your lungs rise and fall with each air movement. 
• Reject nothing, welcome all without judgments, including pain. 
• At this place of acceptance, ask your inner light to bring into focus experiences from your past year, month, week, day—again, nonjudgmentally. 
• Let yourself feel any accompanying emotions—emotions are teachers. 
• Let light flood those experiences. 
• Next visualize moving into the narrow neck of the hourglass, focusing on your breath. 
• Stay with that space of non-change; visualize the light and energy of the sun hovering over you. Don’t rush it. 
• Now move into the broad opening of the bottom of the hourglass. Can you sit with this cosmic energy shift and experience it in your body? As this day signifies a solar and energetic change, what surfaces for you? If nothing, that’s okay—something might surface later—or not. Don’t analyze what’s going on through thinking, only experience it and let your soul bring meaning to whatever’s arising. Allow the past to become the future.

Don’t wait for the summer solstice to practice the hourglass meditation. Every hour take five minutes to stop and visualize this vessel. You can sit at your desk with eyes open. Then breathe, open up to your body’s physical sensations, move into the hourglass’s constrictive space with just breathing, and then open back up to emotions, including any energy you feel is stuck in your body, such as stress in your shoulders, forehead, stomach, hips, hands, or arms. Breathe into those areas nonjudgmentally. 

And may the long time Sun shine upon you, love surround you, and the pure light within you guide your way on!

____

Notes & Sources: 

1. Kabat-Zinn, Jon. He defines mindfulness meditation as “the awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally”. For more information, refer to his many published works.

About the Author: Rev. Mary Coday Edwards is a Spiritual Growth Facilitator and People House Minister. A life-long student of spirituality, Mary spent almost 20 years living, working, and sojourning abroad in Asia, Southeast Asia, East Africa, and Latin America before finding her spiritual connection at People House and completing its Ministerial Program. Past studies include postgraduate studies from the University of South Africa in Theological Ethics/Ecological Justice, focusing on the spiritual and physical interconnectedness of all things. With her MA in Environmental Studies from Boston University, abroad she worked and wrote on environmental sustainability issues at both global and local levels, in addition to working in refugee repatriation.

What makes some people adopt meditation as part of their daily routine, while others struggle with it? I find there is a lot of “I don’t think I’m doing it right.” I have been told, “I can’t stop my mind from racing.” “As soon as I sit down to meditate, I immediately want to get up; I feel restless, bored.” I have heard, “It’s just not for me. I don’t see the point. I feel like I’m wasting my time.” 

Let’s address the “doing it right” concern first.

I often tell my clients that no one meditates the right way, because meditation is a fluid practice that will be somewhat different for everyone. I think most people struggle with many aspects of meditation, especially when they first begin the practice. I know I did! I have been a daily meditator for nearly 20 years, and I honestly dreaded my sitting time the first few months, because it did seem like I could be doing something else. I questioned why I wanted to make this commitment. I found my mind running around like a squirrel in a cage ( or the “monkey mind” Buddhists talk about.) I often would have “to do’s “ come up that I had forgotten about, and felt the immediate need to get up and get a pen and pad and work on that to do list.

But I stuck with it, sometimes through gritted teeth; like any habit, you have to do it long enough before you start to see and feel the benefits. The day came when I realized I was looking forward to my time in meditation, and then the day when I realized I missed it terribly if something came up to disrupt my time. Now my morning meditation is a cherished ritual, and this long time night owl has learned to love the quiet, dark mornings, sitting in silence. I still struggle to quiet my mind and often find myself wandering down thought rabbit holes, but I bring my focus back to my breath, and I let these thoughts go. Over and over again.

What have the benefits been for me? 

It has opened up in me the sense of connection to the spiritual energy that gives rise to all of life, and has taught me that, far from being flawed or broken in some way, I am an integral part of life. It has taught me self-acceptance, self-knowledge, and by extension, a greater acceptance of others.

I have long struggled with anxiety and worry, and it has soothed this anxious spirit and taught me to trust and know that life works out and that there are answers to problems and challenges, and they are within me.

It has helped me become more disciplined and to respect my own time and energy; to not multi task so much. I now try to focus on one thing at a time. It has taught me to be patient and to prioritize my activities. I have learned to listen more and to react less.

It has taught me deep gratitude for the mystical, serene beauty of silence, and of not needing to fill every moment with activity or thought. In this silence, the Divine can find me and whisper in my ear. It has taught me to cherish this planet, our home, and its many wonders.

It has taught me my own worth, as well as the worth of all other beings that inhabit our world; and that we all have this place of wisdom, peace, and love within us. Every one of us. 

So this is why I encourage everyone to begin a meditation practice. If more reasons are needed, studies have shown that meditation can help reduce stress, and the many physical and psychological illnesses that come with it; it can reduce chronic pain in those who suffer from it, by soothing the body’s nervous system and easing the pain/anxiety feedback loop; It may help reduce age related memory loss; improve sleep; help with addiction cravings; reduce blood pressure; and help with many other physical, psychological, and spiritual maladies.

To begin, I would refer you to any of Tara Brach’s or Jack Kornfield’s mindfulness meditation teachings. For those looking for a more scientific approach, look to Jon Kabat Zinn’s mindfulness based stress reduction.

Faye Maguire, MA, LACC, is a People House private practitioner working with youth and adults, using a transpersonal approach to therapy. Counseling is her second career, after being a business owner for nearly 30 years. She enjoys working with people experiencing life transitions, grief and loss, depression, anxiety, trauma, addictions, relationship issues, and figuring out life’s direction, using a holistic approach. Please contact her at 720-331-2454 or at fayemaguire@gmail.com for more information.

From birth we are bombarded with dogma: Merriam Webster defines dogma as “a point of view put forth as authoritative without adequate grounds.”  We are conditioned early on, for better or worse, to believe. 

Believing provides many emotional benefits.

If we believe the world is essentially good, we feel less stress and greater wellbeing. All the unknowns in life can be explained with a belief. Beliefs tell us what to do when and why. They provide a moral and ethical basis to operate from; they are essentially operating programs that tell us how to interpret life. As such, people often ask: “What should I believe? How should I look at this?” 

Behind every belief is a fear.

If you think about it, the only reason anyone adopts a belief is to alleviate a terrible fear. The parent says to the child: “Do what I say, or you will be punished.” This, “What I say” also includes how the parent feels about him or herself – the nonverbal parts of awareness that cause us to react to others unconsciously, i.e., “What you said made me feel like trailer trash.” Obviously, I could not make you feel like trailer trash if you did not already believe that you were.

Beliefs are all self-reinforcing.

If you believe a latte will calm, and reward you, it will. Not only that, but anything anyone does or says to dissuade you from your belief only intrenches you more. You become a “Latte-ite” and look for others to join you. You form groups of latte-ite’s, and that only distracts you from discovering the real source of your stress: It is always another belief, like, “I’m not good enough.” So, behind every belief there is always another belief that counteracts your first belief, such as, “I am good enough. I’m even better than anyone else.” All this complexity works against your own function. It takes a lot of energy to balance “I am good enough” against “I’m not good enough.” It is important to note that neither of these beliefs, that consume so much of your time and energy, have anything to do with who you are. What would it be like to go through life without any beliefs at all? Or should I say, actively observing yourself to see if what you just did was an automatic reaction, and then tracing your reaction to a belief. Having discovered the belief, like: “We should always be loving and kind,” not reinforce it – allow it to wither and die. What you are left with is your naked self. Why don’t you effervesce with love and kindness without your belief? The more you look at the why of what you do, the less you relate in a prescribed way. You begin seeing the fear behind your belief, and you begin to separate who you are from your conditioned self. You become less rigid and controlled, more open and accepting – loving if you will.

David Hoefer is an unlicensed psychotherapist specializing in depression.
He is in private practice at DenverDepressionHelp.com in Denver, and Lakewood, Colorado. He can be reached at 720 404 9160 or hoeferman2@gmail.com; davidhoefer.com.

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. C.G. Jung 

Our bodies are energy. An electrocardiogram (ECG or EKG) measures the electrical activity in the heart. An electroencephalogram (EEG) measures electrical impulses in your brain. 

People House spirituality includes watching that energy, befriending it, welcoming it, asking it what it wants. Much of it remains stuck down in our unconscious/psyche in the form of what we think is “bad” or “wrong” based on what we’ve been taught by often well-meaning parents, teachers, and religious and political authorities. We fear that which we’ve buried. This energy down in our psyche is still driving our lives—we just don’t know it. Every day we make decisions based on unconscious motives and desires and emotions and values and attitudes and beliefs.

Coming to consciousness is bringing that suppressed energy up to the surface and utilizing it for the good of ourselves, humanity, and the planet. That’s why consciousness/energy is transformative. 

Stop. Breathe. Ask the Question.

 A-It’s about paying attention to the energy coursing through your body. Our bodies are present to the here and now while our brains ruminate over the past and plan the future. Our body tells us when we are stressing. It gives off warning signals through the tension we feel in the gut, the shoulders, the legs, in sweaty palms, shortness of breath, a palpitating heart rate. Stress will kill us, or at a minimum contribute to sickness and disease. Steps to dis-ease are as follows: 

1-Notice it. “Whoa, I’m stressed out about something, my gut is so tense.” Or wherever you feel it.

2- Stop and breathe into the stress. Even a minute or two of deep breathing begins the process of changing our unconscious responses. Your reptilian brain demands that you fight, flight, or freeze—an unconscious reaction. By bringing awareness to these signals you learn to respond and make conscious choices and thus break the automatic pattern. You do something different instead of just reacting to it. Our ancestors depended upon this reptilian brain to escape the saber-toothed tiger that wanted them for lunch. “Danger! Danger!” yelled instincts, and pumped the stress hormones adrenaline, cortisol, and norepinephrine into the body to incite it for emergency action. Running then cleansed those hormones from the bloodstream.

Today when we feel threatened by our boss, the civilized human doesn’t have the option of running madly from her desk with a club in her hand, screaming at everyone to flee. Instead those hormones swirl inside her with no release, raising her heart rate and blood pressure—damaging over the long run. Recognizing that stress/energy and breathing into it with self-talk can help dissipate those chemicals, such as saying, “It’s OK. We’ve got this, it’s not the end of the world. I’m feeling threatened, what’s the worst that can happen?” It won’t be a tiger ripping you and your family apart from limb to limb. Breathing into that stress begins the process of breaking up that automatic chemical response. 

3-Then ask your higher self, your inner guide, your spirit, “What can I do next?” It might be nothing, but to stay present to your body and breathe into those spaces where your energy manifests in the form of anxiety or anger or fear or shame—whatever is your go-to emotion.  

You’ll notice that after a while, specific situations bring up stress over and over again—triggers, they’re called. Pema Chödrön, an ordained Buddhist nun in the Shambhala lineage, when asked if situations still triggered her, responded “Oh, yes. But now I’m curious. ‘Isn’t that interesting, I’m being triggered.’” A nun for more than 30 years, triggers for her become interesting, an object of curiosity, a learning experience—not something to berate herself for.

Alchemy: Transform Your Energy into Gold

B-Using various tools, skilled People House spiritual facilitators can work with you to transform that energy into that which is healthy.

1-Gestalt techniques: “Did you notice what you just did with your left hand?” I’ll ask my clients. “Tell me about that.” Their inner energy has manifested itself with a closed fist, or a hand wrapped with the other hand, or any myriad of physical responses reflecting an energy direction. By drawing attention to that, I’m helping them pay attention to something inner manifesting itself outwardly. A gestalt brings to the surface “a this and a that,” aiding the person to create something new out of what is often opposites.

2-We work with the NOW: “What’s most important to you this moment? What needs looked at, what needs loved, attention, right now?” If the past is impinging on the now, it’s up for discussion, but we don’t go digging it up if it’s not important to you NOW.

3-Dreams: What is your unconscious bringing up? What belief, attitude, or value is surfacing that needs looked at, that your conscious needs to recognize and incorporate into your outward life? That is valuable energy that brings transformation.

4-The enneagram: People House has many practitioners trained in its use, a tool to aid in pinpointing one’s automatic and unconscious go-to emotional and mental dialogue to life’s challenges. For example, a type three will see life as a series of failures and successes, with failure her greatest fear, along with an accompanying emotion of shame.  

5-We look at one’s mythos, the stories and rituals we tell ourselves to make sense of our lives. Often unconscious, bringing them into consciousness aids us in discovering if they’re still serving us or not. If not, stress surfaces and we return to stop, breathe, and ask the questions.

Referring to Joseph Campbell (1), People House minister Wayne Tittes, Sr., says of People House spirituality, “Follow your bliss and the Universe will open doors where there were only walls,” and that “the voice of People House would say, ‘You can trust yourself to find your bliss and the courage to follow it. Your thinking mind doesn’t need to know how it’s going to turn out. That [finding your bliss] requires going inside and coming to know yourself. Community can help so much when you know you’re not alone on that discovery path’” (2).

May 2021 be a year of transformation for you as you make your unconscious, conscious!

____

Notes & Sources: 

1. Moyers, Bill. Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth. Anchor, 1991.  (p. 155, p. 194)
2. Interview by text messaging, 12.30.2020.
3. Kabat-Zinn, Jon. He defines mindfulness meditation as “the awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally”. For more information, refer to his many published works.
4. Kripal, Jeffrey. Esalen: America and the Religion of No Religion. University of Chicago Press, 2007.

About the Author: Rev. Mary Coday Edwards is a Spiritual Growth Facilitator and People House Minister. A life-long student of spirituality, Mary spent almost 20 years living, working, and sojourning abroad in Asia, Southeast Asia, East Africa, and Latin America before finding her spiritual connection at People House and completing its Ministerial Program. Past studies include postgraduate studies from the University of South Africa in Theological Ethics/Ecological Justice, focusing on the spiritual and physical interconnectedness of all things. With her MA in Environmental Studies from Boston University, abroad she worked and wrote on environmental sustainability issues at both global and local levels, in addition to working in refugee repatriation.

I would wager the vast majority of people these days probably don’t consider much of a spiritual element in the way that they care for their dwelling space, save, perhaps, for a yoga or meditation corner. The closest iteration of ritual for some people is likely in the way they decorate, or even the regularity with which they clean their homes. 

As a person who is drawn to the art of subtle energies (intuition, psychic experiences, empathic feelings, etc.), I was very intrigued to come across The House Witch by Arin Murphy-Hiscock just days before our move. In all my studies of magic, alternative healing, and the like, the most I’ve ever come across about “hearthcraft,” if you will, can be generally summed up by the following statement:

“It’s important to take care of the energy in your space.”

There often isn’t much more to it, so in the past I’ve done a few things here and there, but mostly ignored the energy in my home because, save for a neglected altar and a periodic smoke cleansing, I didn’t know what else to do. 

It is not a new concept to make the home a sacred space, but it is, I believe, in this period of collective upheaval and uncertainty, a better time than most to start trying. Cultivating helpful, loving energy in your home can be as simple or as formal (I’m looking at you, Capricorn!) as you’d like to make it. One of the most beneficial aspects of cultivating magic, chi, or energy in your home is that this spruced-up vibration then flows into other areas of your life. If this seems like a foreign concept, consider this:

Many of the principles of home and hearth magic share their ethos with Buddhist and mindfulness-based practices. 

In a nutshell, cultivating the energy in your home can be done by focusing in the following key areas, which have been paraphrased and expanded from The House Witch:

1. Learning to be present. This can be especially helpful in moments when we feel tired or rushed, such as trying to get dressed to get out the door, or sluggishly putting together a meal at the end of a long day. Focusing on the task at hand rather than what has happened in the past or the future helps to calm the mind and as such, the environment around you.
2. Creating intention. Even the smallest task, such as seasoning food or washing dishes, becomes an elevated experience when the intention is made to do it just so. This is not about micromanaging, but about creating awareness around why you are doing something, rather than just zoning out or seeing it as something to get through. With intention we harness the energy to nurture ourselves and our space.
3. Clearly direct your energy. Somewhat of an extension of creating intention, directing your energy means using your focus to pinpoint where you want your energy to go and what you want the outcome to be. When we are less mindful, especially when we are tired or rushed, we lose a lot of valuable energy simply because we are not creating clear intention and direction with our tasks. 
4. Hocus, focus. Pick one thing at a time to focus on. Life starts to feel overwhelming when our minds run rampant, trying to decipher and problem-solve everything at once. Meditation can certainly help with this, as can creating awareness around moments of feeling overwhelmed and scatterbrained. Even if you’re worried about tomorrow’s project, give yourself the gift of taking a mental break from that while you stir your soup, or place the blanket back on the couch. 

Humans also have a tendency to focus their attention on what they perceive as their personal space within a home, such as a bedroom or office. Collective spaces, like the kitchen and living room, are then left at the mercy of whatever energies collect by the colliding of multiple lives that occur there. Paying attention to shared spaces is just as important, if not more so, than monitoring the energy of private parts of the home. 

If you’re feeling ready to take a more active role in guiding the energy of your home, here are a few simple ways to get started:

a. Place a bowl of water or salt in a room to absorb unwanted energy. This can also be done in the four corners of the house to create a grid, but should be discarded and refreshed frequently. The same can be done using crystals and cleansing them on a regular basis. Smoky quartz and black tourmaline are good for this.

b. Clean with intention. Sweep towards the doors that lead outside, mentally picturing any unhelpful energy getting swept away along with it. Dispose of any debris in trash cans outside the home; don’t let it sit inside once it’s been intentionally collected. If you like you can follow this up with an herbal floor wash. Simply make a tea of your favorite loose herbs and dilute a bit with water, using the energy of your hands or focused intention that the herbs fill the water and your home with blessings and protection. 

c. Smoke is a common choice for cleansing a space these days, and can be very effective, but seeing as how white sage and palo santo are now at risk plants due to overharvesting, and are sacred to certain cultures, it’s great to look into other options. Juniper and mugwort are both quite prolific and cleansing in their own rite. Chimes or singing bowls can also be used to cleanse a space using sound vibration. For more folk-inspired techniques, hanging a rope of garlic or placing a cut onion in the center of the room are also said to dispel unhelpful energies. 

I tend to prefer philosophies that value the depth of intention over how closely one follows specific instructions. To that end, if there are ideas that come to you naturally about how you’d like to cultivate your space, I think that is just as valid as any instructions found in a book.

If you find yourself feeling frayed, lacking energy, or simply feeling the weight of the world these days, you are certainly not alone.

Taking time to care for both yourself and your home can provide a much-needed refuge, a place for you to rest and restore as you follow your path in this world. 

Blessed be. 

If you’re interested in more ways to take care of your home, including recipes and more complex rituals, please do read “The House Witch” by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. It does not fall under the category of “Wicca” but is simply based on the author’s personal practice, which takes inspiration from many different areas. 

Of not knowing what to do. Our society avoids the bad feelings, and in turn we spend a whole lot of time and energy trying to escape what it is to be human.

I am so tired of seeing directives wherever I go. “Be kind”, “Live, Laugh, Love”, “Seize the day”, “Smile”, “Get lost”.  I am also tired of seeing self help books, self help podcasts, and magazine covers with 10 ways to be happy or lose weight or get active.

Sometimes I just long to see some wall art calligraphy that says “don’t listen to me, just do your thing, you’ll figure it out, I’m just as lost as you”. Because that would be more honest. It would be authentic enough to say, “none of us have got this, I’m just as confused as you”.

We are terrified of feeling bad.

And we are terrified of not knowing what to do. So, when anxiety does arise, we are scared of the anxiety itself. (the same goes for grief, sadness, loneliness, anger, confusion, despair).

I have internalized this societal belief in a particular way. Anxiety is a familiar feeling to me; I’ve inherited it from society and my family.  When I feel my anxiety rising or when I feel uncertain about the future, I have a compulsion to consult my tarot deck. I pull cards and really hope I’m going to get one that tells me I’m moving in the right direction, that it’s going to be great and that I’m not going to starve in a pit of hungry animals. And when I don’t get a reassuring answer, I pull more cards.

This ritual doesn’t actually calm me down at all. It just gives more for my anxious brain to think about. Because anxiety is telling me to find something to give it more energy… to find out what’s wrong and fix it now!

Anxiety is a tornado that scoops up everything in its path to make it stronger. So, seeing all these directives, lists of how-tos and self-help books doesn’t make it better.  They feed the anxiety, they provide the anxiety with fuel to keep going… Anxiety starts screaming at me “Something’s wrong, and you need to figure it out, and this can give you something to work on, it might have the answer, and then do it, if you do it fast enough you’ll have it figured out and maybe you won’t be feeling this feeling anymore.”

Anxiety is like a fire, and all those directives are like pine trees in a drought; they just feed it.

Sometimes I am able to recognize the anxiety for what it is. That it is a fire burning in my belly (or my head) and that I need to give it space, that I need to find a way to put it out. I need to clear the area so that more trees don’t get sucked into it further.

Sometimes I give it water. There are times when I can take a bath, and breathe and say to myself, “I’m feeling anxious and that’s ok, I will just take a bath to give the anxiety a chance to burn down a bit”. Or sometimes I remove all fuel from the vicinity… fuel includes reading the news, tarot cards, self-help books, blogs. Or go for a walk with my dog and say to myself, “nothing needs to be done right now, it’s ok, and I’m going to do my best to not make decisions while I take this walk”.

I know I’m a hypocrite, that this blog post sounds a lot like advice giving… and, yes, it is…. And I am. So here is my soapbox rant in short. I’m suggesting that avoiding what is uncomfortable can make it worse, and we have to sift through a lot of “happy advertising” telling us what to do instead.  I am expressing a plea to free our society from the subtle oppression of self-help and subtle directives in order to give us the freedom to live our own struggles and find peace within ourselves without the constant bombardment of being to told what will make it better. 

Stephanie Boulton, MA LPCC (she/her/hers) is a counselor in private practice and is part of the People House Community. She also volunteers with Out Boulder County, co-facilitating a support group for Friends and Family of Transgender/Gender Non-Conforming People. Stephanie has a background working with a diversity of people in outdoor settings and draws from attachment theory, body-based and experiential therapies, as well as ecological and feminist approaches. Stephanie’s website can be found at www.soulterracounseling.com or you can email her at steph@soulterracounseling.com.

People refuse to wear masks, thus endangering the lives of our more vulnerable from Covid. Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos added $13 billion to his net worth in a single day, while his company paid just a little over 1% in taxes in 2019, despite the United States 21% federal tax rate on corporations (1). An estimated 19 to 23 million individuals are at high risk of being evicted from their homes by the end of September, hitting Black and Latinx rents the hardest (2). We have a corporatized healthcare system unable and ill-equipped to provide basic healthcare and fostering increasing inequities (3). And we have a policing system rife with systemic and structural racism.

In spite of all the anger and yes—hate—we can train in compassion. We train in order to RELEARN to relate to ourselves, others, and the world around us from a place of understanding and compassion rather than from excessive judgment. Full disclosure: I can more easily extend compassion and well-being toward the sheep. It’s the leaders who perpetuate social and ecological injustices for greed, selfishness, and political gain who I have trouble with. 

SEE BEHIND: THE INTENTION TO BE OPEN TO THE FIELD OF LOVE

For this I turn to the teachings of Andrew Dreitcer, Associate Professor of Spirituality, Director of Spiritual Formation, and Co-Director of the Center for Engaged Compassion. I attended his workshop at the 2016 International Symposium for Contemplative Studies, hosted by the Mind & Life Institute (4 and 5). 

Using a thousand-year-old Christian early morning practice, he led us in a process of INTENTION to be open;  i.e., when we are not capable of compassion, but we truly desire to be available to the presence of love, for ourselves and others. 

First centering ourselves, he asked us to seek within us one word that could focus us on the intention to be open. 

That word—our mantra—was then the focus of our meditation for the next 20 minutes, the idea being that throughout the day when anger or fury arose and compassion for our fellow human beings was nowhere to be found, we could return to this word with the intent to extend compassion. 

I find this process very hopeful—and helpful. Instead of throwing myself on the rocks for my lack of compassion, I can at least stay in this space of intent, knowing it is an ancient monastic tradition where it just might lead me into a “connection with an eternal, loving presence,” as Andrew called it.  

SEE BEHIND: COMPASSION VS. EMPATHY

At that same conference, Geshe Thupten JInpa of McGill University spoke on “Understanding the Psychology Behind Compassion Meditation.”

Compassion is a natural sense of concern that arises within us when confronted with another’s suffering and then feel motivated to see that suffering relieved. 

It’s comprised of three parts: first there’s the understanding that someone IS suffering; second, we feel an emotional connection; and third, we are motivated to see the suffering relieved. And this third piece of “doing” includes the prayerful act of practicing lovingkindness toward another, of wishing the other well by connecting spiritually to our common humanity.

A significant difference between empathy and compassion is that third step:  empathy takes us to the place where we enter emotionally into someone else’s suffering; we focus on the problem and the experience of it. If we stay in this emotional swirl, we can easily shift into “empathy burnout”. 

We manifest compassion, however, when motivated to relieve that suffering; it takes on an ethical quality—a way of being. 

A solution to the personal distress of empathy burnout is to shift empathy to compassion. Empathy can take a form of “feeling for” vs. the “feeling with” of compassion.  

SEE BEHIND

On the word lovingkindness, meditation author and teacher Sharon Salzberg says that while the word includes “a deep acknowledgement of connection [with someone], it doesn’t mean you like them or approve of them; it doesn’t demand action; it doesn’t mean being sweet, with only a sugary ‘yes’” to that which contradicts who we are.

“Compassion,” she continued, “rests on the shared understanding that we are all quite vulnerable. In life there is nothing we can hold on to” as permanent, all is always changing. 

Whatever your experience is, sit mindfully with it experience nonjudgmentally, asking your higher self what you can do to mitigate the suffering around us. You may just sit there and breathe, expressing goodwill toward that person. You may find yourself walking away. You may find yourself at a demonstration, facing exposure to teargas. 

I encourage you to see behind: to see behind someone else’s comments and actions—and your own. Train in shifting that energy within you from excessive judgment to compassion and lovingkindness.

Notes & Sources: 

1. https://www.fastcompany.com/90536152/calculate-how-many-seconds-it-takes-jeff-bezos-to-earn-your-annual-salary; https://www.salon.com/2020/07/24/as-laid-off-workers-face-a-financial-cliff-amazons-jeff-bezos-grows-13-billion-richer-in-one-day_partner/
2. https://www.healthaffairs.org/do/10.1377/hblog20200730.190964/full/
3. https://www.who.int/features/factfiles/health_inequities/en/#:~:text=Health%20inequities%20are%20differences%20in,right%20mix%20of%20government%20policies.
4. ISCS “brings together scientists, scholars, artists and contemplatives to explore distinct though overlapping fields of research and scholarship, using a multidisciplinary, integrative approach to advance our understanding of the human mind.” This blog includes thoughts from a previous blog I wrote in 2017.
5. The mission of the Mind & Life Institute is to alleviate suffering and promote flourishing by integrating science with contemplative practice and wisdom traditions. https://www.mindandlife.org/mission 

About the Author: Rev. Mary Coday Edwards is a Spiritual Growth Facilitator and People House Minister. A life-long student of spirituality, Mary spent almost 20 years living, working, and sojourning abroad in Asia, Southeast Asia, East Africa, and Latin America before finding her spiritual connection at People House and completing its Ministerial Program. Past studies include postgraduate studies from the University of South Africa in Theological Ethics/Ecological Justice, focusing on the spiritual and physical interconnectedness of all things. With her MA in Environmental Studies from Boston University, abroad she worked and wrote on environmental sustainability issues at both global and local levels, in addition to working in refugee repatriation.

I think we’ve probably all seen it by now, from It Girls to Instagram – crystals are having a moment. While it may seem like a recent trend, there is something beautiful, magical and mysterious that’s drawn humans to rocks and minerals throughout history. It’s no coincidence that the Hope Diamond is one of the most highly visited museum objects in the world. 

My own love affair with crystals started when I was about 7 years old. I began a rock collection, taking pride in each new selection I added to my windowsill. Some stones I found in the woods behind my house, some were purchased at rustic gem and mineral shops I came across with my parents. In those stores I would take my time looking over everything, curious about the ones I had never seen before, finally settling on the select few I would take home with me. I loved every one of them. 

For a long time I didn’t know what else to do with them, other than admire them from my bed. My grandmother had a few tumbled stones of her own and I would sometimes see her holding them with her eyes closed, gently turning them in her fingers. 

It wasn’t until many years later that I met a crystal healer and some deep internal light of recognition was set aflame. It was a moment I had been waiting for my whole life without ever really realizing it. That very special encounter spurred a chain of events that unlocked a deeper understanding – and pride – of who I really am. 

I now work in tandem with stones and other methods of energy healing in order to bring a sense of peace and calm to those who come for sessions. Different types of crystals can be used to quiet the mind, clear away unwanted energy, and bring a deep sense of centeredness to the body. I’m consistently amazed by the tangible effects stones have on people, no matter how skeptical they may be. 

Below are a few of my favorite crystals – all of which are abundantly available and affordable – to clear away stress and help bring you back to yourself. 

Lepidolite

Most people are attracted to lepidolite purely based on its appearance, and it’s easy to see why. It often resembles a pearlescent, lilac-colored mica. Lepidolite is my favorite “quite the mind” stone. When someone is keyed up from stress, or even reeling from an argument with a loved one, holding a piece of lepidolite helps draw that energy down, replacing feelings of agitation with a soothing blanket of tranquility. Naisha Ahsian says in The Book of Stones, “Lepidolite is deeply relaxing and is one of the most powerful stones in for countering stress, worry, fear, grief, and other traumatic emotional frequency.”

Sodalite

My beloved teacher always referred to sodalite as “etheric soap,” and that is a very apt description. When a person feels their mind is “on the hamster wheel” and just won’t stop moving, sodalite is a wonderful remedy. By taking two stones and placing them on either side of the head, behind the temples within the hairline, you can almost see the incessant thoughts start to dissipate. Its gift is in helping one to stay focused on the present moment, without worry of the past or future.

Amazonite

Amazonite is a stone of personal truth, activating and aligning the heart and throat in order to more effectively express one’s inner truth without fear of confrontation or conflict. In this sense it is also helpful for setting personal boundaries. In addition to that, amazonite is helpful even when someone doesn’t know exactly what they want or how they feel about something. It points the way to inner wisdom, even going so far as to illuminate one’s own gifts and talents if they are having trouble unearthing them. 

Emerald

Emeralds are part of the beryl family, all of which are deeply relaxing to the physical and emotional bodies. Rough emeralds are easy to find at gem and mineral shows. Though they may not be as bright and shiny as those you may see in a jewelry store, they’re very supportive stones to have in your repertoire. When a person is feeling a general sense of heaviness, emerald gently diffuses that into a feeling of hope, encouragement and abundance. It helps to remove feelings of unworthiness, supporting the heart and helping to attune oneself to the frequency of Divine Love. 

A Quick Note on How to Use Crystals

Here’s the short answer: it doesn’t have to be complicated! Holding a stone while you sleep, meditate, or simply close your eyes is an easy way to connect with its energy. If you’re lying down, you may feel moved to place a stone over a certain part of your body, such as your heart, solar plexus, or third eye. You can even place one under your pillow at night, assuming it’s comfortable. The general consensus is that the human energetic field extends about three feet on all sides, so as long as your chosen crystal is within that vicinity, you can be sure it’s having a beneficial effect. The most important aspect in connecting with stones is finding a way that resonates with you personally. 

Where to Find Crystals

My favorite place to find crystals are gem and mineral shows. Denver has a great one at the coliseum (with outposts in hotels such as The Clarion throughout the city) in early September every year. Though it can be a bit overwhelming, taking your time to look through vendors and find special stones that resonate with you is a very rewarding experience. You also tend to find great variety as well as great prices at these sorts of shows.

Nature’s Own is a store in Nederland, with an excellent variety of quality stones. Also local but with a great online store is Pink Heart Healing. Beth Ann has a wonderful collection of stones to choose from, all with detailed descriptions of what they are helpful for. Happy rock shopping!

I hope you enjoy your exploration of the many healing qualities crystals have to offer! 

~Megan

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About Me

I’ve always been interested in the many varieties of alternative healing. Before I knew anyone who actually practiced them, I would read books about everything from shamanism to past life regression. 

I began my own journey into the healing arts studying herbalism in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia. It was there, learning about plants in their medicinal and spiritual aspects, that I finally found a home for my wandering soul. It was a blessing to then move to Colorado and find a community of people doing the things I’d been so excited to read about in books! 

I now incorporate herbalism, crystal healing and reiki into my practice, as well as  currently studying shamanic healing in the Norse tradition with the hopes of offering that in the future. For more information, feel free to visit my website, Freyja Healing Arts.